THEBESTMIND
Published on February 28, 2020

7 Steps to Get Over The end of a Relationship

There’s literally no better time to rebrand yourself than after a breakup. Sure, it sucks, and you definitely have to take the time to mourn the relationship you are losing someone who was consistently in your life, but you don’t have to continue to dwell on the breakup. Hello everyone and welcome to thebestmind.net. In this article we're going to learn about seven steps to get over a breakup easily.

Stop distracting yourself

In the wake of a breakup, you might try to smother your feelings by constantly distracting yourself. You might suddenly adopt a bunch of new hobbies, spend way too much time with your friends or try to bury yourself in your work. You find yourself doing anything and everything to avoid thinking about your ex.

So, do you know what happens when you stop? What happens when you run out of distractions? Your ex is almost always the very first thing on your mind. Distractions do work for some things. They help you avoid cravings and resist the urge to be lazy, but when it comes to relationships, there's one big problem.

When you distract yourself, you aren't actually processing your grief, you're just running away from the issue. It's no different than stuffing those negative feelings way deep down. You might feel better in the moment, but those feelings didn't disappear. They'll slowly, but surely rise back to the surface because you never tried to reconcile what went wrong.

How do we know distractions don't work? Breakups are so specific and diverse that they can be a challenging subject to study. In 2018, a group of researchers put the power of distractions to the test. They looked at different ways to reduce feelings of love after a breakup. So, they gathered a sample of people who had just ended their relationships and they tried out three different cognitive strategies: negative appraisal, self-acceptance and distraction.

It turns out distraction was one of the most effective strategies for short-term relief, but it was completely useless over time. Once that distraction faded, people felt just as much love for their ex as they did before.

In other words, distractions won't help you move on from your relationships. Instead of avoiding your negative feelings, try to unravel them. Let yourself be sad and allow yourself to grieve. That can help to sit down with a friend or family member and really hash it out.

Try your best to get to the root of the breakup and what you're worried about moving forward, because the only way to get past those deeper issues is to acknowledge that they do exist.

Sever connections

An object can carry a lot more emotional weight than most people think. A shirt for example, can take you back to a vacation with someone you love. A trinket might transport you to a Christmas that you spend together.

On the surface, they're just random objects, but they contain all kinds of memories and strong feelings. After a breakup, the last thing you want is a constant reminder of the love you once shared. Get rid of those sentimental items.

It's time to sever any and all physical connections with your ex, because each time you glance over at that little trinket on your shelf or wear that t-shirt you've bought on vacation, you're gonna fall back into the same old patterns. You'll remember the person you lost and you'll get stuck in the same rut all, because you weren't ready to make a clean break.

It's time to close up old chapter in your life. For doing that, you have to put the entire past behind you. The point is to get all reminders out of your life, because the longer you look at them, the longer it's going to take to move on.

Paint a complete picture

Many people idealize their ex after a big breakup. They remember everything they're missing out on, all their best qualities, all the fun things that you used to do together. They imagine this picture perfect image of their partner, but they forget one beer important thing; there was a reason you broke up and your ex wasn't perfect. They had flaws and shortcomings just like everybody else.

When looking back on your relationship, you need to paint a complete picture. It means remembering the good and the bad. When you idealize your partner, those lingering feelings will stick around a lot longer than they need to.

To make matters worse idealizing someone will also convince you that you've made a horrible error and your breakup was a bad decision. Don't make this mistake. If you want to get over a past relationship, you have to stop seeing the person perfect and you need to see things as really they were.

Contemplate your health

After an emotional breakup, there's one thing you can say. For sure, for one reason or another, your ex were just not right for you. Maybe they weren’t able to accept many points of your personality.

My point here is that, your ex were a problem. They were making you a less healthy person and that means your breakup, no matter who started, it will be one of the healthiest things that has ever happened to you.

So, go back and reflect on all the reasons why your ex were bad fit for you. It helps you figure out what kind of person you really want to be with and it shows you just how many new doors are waiting to be opened.

Control your sleep

After a breakup, your sleep schedule often takes a turn for the worse. Either you sleep too little trimming, your usual eight hours down to a measly five or six. This change to your sleep schedule will affect you and your ability to move on, because unhealthy sleep patterns keep your mood down, your energy drained and your enthusiasm at an all-time low.

That's just what happens when you don't get enough sleep. An easy way to move past a breakup is to keep your sleep schedule under control. Make sure you're getting at least eight hours every night, not two hours less and not two hours more.

Even if you're feeling exhausted, you can't let yourself  keep sleeping. More sleep isn't going to fix that constant feeling of fatigue, because you're not actually tired. It's just that your brain is emotionally worn down since the break-up and it's been overwhelmed by stress and strong emotions.

So, your brain is going to have trouble getting started like it normally does. That's why the best thing you can do is stick to a balanced sleep schedule and to force your brain to follow suit. If you can keep that up, you'll have a much easier time getting back to normal.

Reboot your routines

Your sleep schedule isn't the only routine that flies off the rails. Good habits like eating healthy and exercising regularly tend to fall by the wayside. Why, because it's hard to feel motivated and disciplined after a breakup. It takes a lot of self-control to keep up those healthy routines. Emotional fatigue throws self-control out the window.

It becomes harder and harder to push yourself in the right direction. Your partner might have also become ingrained into your daily habits. You might have cooked together or gone to the gym together. You might have gotten used to doing your routines with your partner at your side. Now, that they're gone everything feels different and you can't motivate yourself to keep going.

If this sounds like you, it's time to reboot your routines. It's time to give them a complete overhaul to change up the time of day when you go to the gym maybe or start doing a whole new set of exercises.

At home, just try cooking dishes you've never made before and find new people to enjoy your healthy routines with. Think of these habits like any other object that your ex left behind. To move on, you need to reboot your daily routines and give your healthy lifestyle a new start.

Rediscover yourself

The last step of getting over a breakup is to think of your breakup as an opportunity. You can use all that time and energy to rediscover yourself and to find the version of you that existed before the relationship.

The you that wasted hours on random personal projects. The you that didn't have to cater to anyone except yourself, but while you're rediscovering yourself, there's one very important thing to remember. You need to stay single after a breakup.

Many people fill that void by jumping into another relationship. A new partner might make you feel better at first, but this relationship is just a distraction and it's going to hurt you in the long run, because you're not giving yourself the chance to enjoy your freedom, embrace your real passions or love yourself as a single self-reliant person.

Thank you for reading this article and be sure to consult our website to stay informed about our coming articles, because more incredible content is on the way.

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